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NOTE: The stories which follow are students' response to an assignment to write a "story of planning," either about "planning" or about planners, based on historical fact or completely fabricated.
This story of planning is a project for URSI 602, in honor of Jack Zipes' visit to MSU. The people and places featured in this story are purely fictional.
Once Upon A Time... in a far away land, there stood the great city of Urn. The residents lived simply, but comfortable within their great walled city, under the benevolent leadership of good King Simon. Each day, the gates of the great city were opened to welcome peasants, travelers and merchants alike to the great marketplace at the center of town. The busy streets and market of Urn were filled with wares from far and near, providing a comforable living for all the residents of the great city.
It came to pass that the surrounding countryside was plagued by highway robbers and common thieves who preyed upon the travelers coming to market in Urn. Merchants no longer felt safe traveling with their goods, and strangers within the city gates were looked upon with suspicion and loathing by the residents. Seeing this fear in his subjects troubled good King Simon greatly, so he asked of his wise council what might be done to protect the residents of the great city.
" Require all visitors to be escorted while inside the city gates," declared the first counselor, "that will keep the strangers out of mischief!" King Simon shook his head. The King's second counselor suggested that bands of citizens be sent into the countryside to keep watch on the travels and insure that they would reach the great city of Urn unharmed. "No, that will only push the hoodlums further away, to attack travelers at a greater distance," said good King. Finally, his wisest and most trused counselor declared, "I have just the answer we are searching for! The only sure way to protect ourselves it to open the gates no more! Our great walls will shield us from the thievery and violence of the countryside. Dear King, close the gates for good I say!". And so, with the wise advice from his counselors in mind, good King Simon decided to sleep on it.
The very next morning, a group of travelers and peasants coming to market in the great city of Urn gathered outside the gate, waiting as was customary. The sun rose higher and higher into the sky and still the group outside the gate waited. And still the gate did not open. As the day wore on, some of the travelers grew restless and moved on to the next city along the path. Still others continued to wait, and wait. Soon it was nightfall, the last of group had given up, and the gate remained as it had been - closed.
And so it was, day after day - the gate to the great city of Urn had been declared a hazard to public safety, and ordered to remain closed by order of the good King Simon. At first, the residents of the city rejoiced, happy to be protected, comfortable within the protective walls of the great city. But soon, the great market in the center of town became deserted and the streets remained empty of people. There was no need to leave the house - there were no goods to be bought or sold, and no one to sell them to anyway. The citizens of Urn became lazy, sleeping away most of the day, rising only to eat ocassionally. Without reason to awake, one by one, the residents of Urn fell into a deep sleep. The road that lead to the gate became overgrown with weeds and thickets - barely visible to the passerby. The great walls of the city became covered with ivy and brambles - barely recognizable as the great city it once had been. Slowly, the city that had once dominated the surroun! ding forest, became part of the forest.
Stories about the great city that had fallen asleep were told in neighboring town, mostly to scare the children at bedtime. A young adventurer by the name of Edward had heard the incredible tales, and wanting to see if they were true, went off into the forest to find the great sleeping city. He struggled through brush and overgrown fields until he found what appeared to be the remains of a foot path. Following this deeper and deeper into the forest, Edward came upon a mass of bramble and ivy covering what appeared to be a city wall! Cutting his way through the tangled brush, he finally came to the gate.
It had been many years, and the great wooden gate had all but rotted away. Pushing his way through the now useless barrier, Edward found himself on a deserted street. The shops and carts were seemed all but abandoned. Peeking into the nearby bakery, he noticed the baker asleep behind the counter. "So it is true! A city fast asleep," he whispered to himself, as he stepped back into the street. The brave young adventurer made his way to the King's keep, intent on waking him first.
Needless to say, good King Simon was surprised to be awakened by a perfect stranger shaking him vigorously. But when Edward had explained his presence, and showed the King the sad state of the once great city, King Simon quickly gather together members of his court and sent them out into the city to wake the citizens of Urn. As the citizens were awakened one by one, they gathered in the remains of the great marketplace. "I declare the gate reopened, never to be closed again!" cried good King Simon, and with that, the citizens took to the task of tearing down the old rotten gate, clearing the path to the city and clearing away the dust of many years of disuse.
Soon, travelers, merchants and peasants from far and near were traveling to the great city of Urn to visit the busy market at the center of town. Good King Simon, to show his gratitude to young Edward, gave him the position as the king's wisest and most trusted counselor. What happened to King Simon's wisest and most trusted counselor of old? He sleeps undisturbed within the castle of the great city of Urn to this day.
Johanna Isakson
Where should the new highway be built?
The city officials couldn't decide.
Then one official said,
"Let's take a helicopter, and fly over the city.
In that way, we can see the whole city at once,
and we can plan a route for the new highway."
But the mayor reminded them
that the city didn't own a helicopter.
"Besides," he continued, "what we really need is
a man
who knows how to make improvements in a city.
I'm going to call in a city planner.
He can plan a good route for the highway,
and maybe come up with some other improvements, too.
What's more, he'll show us what they look like
on a model of the city."
When a city planner suggests changes, he wants to show
what the city would look like if certain changes were made.
So, he can prepare a small model
that shows the city-and the changes.
The model may show a new highway or a new park
or new buildings before they are built.
If the city officials approve the changes in the model city,
then work can begin on the changes in the real city.
Chad Bergo
Once upon a time in a land far, far away, there lived a beautiful young princess
named Venetia. She lived in a time of widespread authoritarian rule of kings and queens
with kingdoms spread all across the countryside. The power of these rulers was feared and
hated by all, including young Venetia. So at the young age of 18, Venetia rebelled and left
her father's castle in search of a more peaceful existence, free from the strong handed rule
of her father, King Zonius III.
Off young Venetia went in search of true happiness in an unregulated existence far
away from the protection of her own family. She had her sights set on Justice Township, a
two day journey from her father's castle. Justice Township was a small settlement beyond
the reach of authoritarian rule and regulation. It consisted almost entirely of men who had
fled the cruel government regulation found in surrounding kingdoms. Venetia was
attracted by this regulation-free paradise.
The sun was shining radiantly as she purchased her parcel of land from a local
farmer. The property, though only large enough to snuggly fit a small cottage, rested on a
wide open field filled with animals, flowers, and fruited trees. With her own two hands she
built a cottage of wood and sod, complete with windows and a fireplace. It was all she had
ever dreamed of.
In a completely male village, it wasn't long before the field around young Venetia's
cottage became valuable real estate. Local residents collected their small fortunes so that
they could purchase a lot in the farmer's field. Each man wanting to be assured of an
uninhibited view of the beautiful newcomer built their own wood cottages as close as they
could to Venetia's, allowing for windows to look into their neighbors
home.
Once settled in her new home, Venetia was attracted to all the activity surrounding
her cottage. Though she dearly missed the view of the trees and flowers, she saw the men
as an opportunity to experience life to the fullest. Young Venetia took special notice of
young man named Thomas who had built his cottage next to her bedroom window. Seeing
his eyes peeping in at her, Venetia waved him in so that she might meet this handsome
neighbor.
It wasn't very long before Thomas and Venetia had fallen head over heels in love
with each other. They exchange marriage vows less than a week after they had met in the
field outside what had become their high-density urban development. They returned to
Venetia's cottage to anoint their vows in the room where they
had met.
When all had been anointed, Thomas rolled a cigar and sat back with his bride.
The two lay together talking of their perfect existence in their unregulated life. And they
dreamed of a happy life together until they drifted off to sleep. Unfortunately, as they
slept, ashes from Thomas' cigar made their way into Venetia's straw mattress. Soon the
entire development was consumed by the burning inferno. In short time, all of Justice
Township was reduced to a pile of smoldering ashes.
News of the disaster spread quickly, making its way back to Venetia's father, King
Zonius III. Full of remorse, he directed his servant Planius to make sure that this type of
disaster would never happen again. The result of Planius' hard work was a moat being
built around the castle to ensure that other structures would be setback a safe distance to
prevent the spread of fire. Planius also made sure that all the windows in the kingdom
were properly covered.
In the end, some good did come out of the tragic story of young Princess Venetia.
Planius is credited with inventing the Venetian blind and for giving rise to present day
building setback regulations. Now all the people of the land, as far as this story has
traveled have come to realize that government regulations should be embraced as attempts
to protect the lives and properties of the common man, they are in the interest of the public
good. Thus is the beginning of height, bulk, and density zoning regulations.
Ron Mullenbach
Once upon a time, there was an Environmental Planner named Paul Bunyan. During the late 1800's, he was know for his ability to change the environment. In those times, huge sections of America were filled with dark green forests. And the forests were filled with trees as far as the eye could see. But the pioneers needed them to build houses, churches, ships, wagons, bridges, and barns. So one day Paul Bunyan decided to swing his bright steel ax. There was a terrible crash, and Paul looked around and saw ten pine trees down with a single swing.
With the help of his pet, Babe the Blue Ox, Paul pulled the Mississippi River straight enough to allow the trees to flow down stream. He walked through the untamed North Woods and made the Great Lakes for shipping. Paul and Babe cleared cottonwoods out of Kansas so farmers could plant wheat. They cleared oaks out of Iowa so farmers could plant corn. On their way to the coast, Paul was dragging his ax behind him. He did not realize he was leaving a big ditch, today the ditch is called the Grand Canyon.
Paul and Babe were last heard of traveling through Alaska toward the Arctic Circle. The stories of Paul and Babe are still told today. Many examples of clear cutting forests can be still be seen. In South American trees are cut so the land can be farmed.
Rebecca Sternquist
There once was a village deep in the forest called Gardenville.
It was a small community, but one that thrived on the hardworking
individuals that made Gardenville what it was. Gardenville was
a beautiful place complete with lush lawns and fragrant flowers.
There were golden daffodils that sprung over the towering lilies
and the flourishing spruce green lawn that lined the cement and
cedar chipped roadways.
All the native bees that lived in this particular village were
extremely close due to the fact that they all seemed to work together
and were some how related to each other in one way or another.
With every community, there are different groups of bees. In this
particular village, the different groups consisted of the worker
bees, the drones and the royal queen bee. The worker bees were
considered average, hardworking and had concerns about keeping
their job at the honey factory and their families. The drones
were relatively upper class and held many of the management level
jobs at the factory and the governmental roles in the community.
Their basic concerns consisted of maintaining and improving the
lifestyle of Gardenville. Finally, there is Queen Anita Bee who
by all means is the most powerful bee in the village. Queen A.
Bee is the current mayor of Greenville and works hard in creating
continuity and harmony between the different groups and the needs
of the village.
One day, Buzzard T. Bee was flying around daffodil gardens on
his lunch break trying to come up with some sort of new vision
for the village of Gardenville. You see, Buzzard is the village
planner and was directed by the council of drones to come up with
a new housing plan for the village. Gardenville has grown tremendously
since the new edition to the honey factory was completed early
last fall. Since then, there has been an outstanding demand for
more housing.
Buzzard wanted something innovative for the village of Gardenville.
Something new, exciting and different then all the other villages
in the forest. With that in mind, Buzzard collected several bees
from the village to form a housing strategic plan focus group.
He invited bees that served on the council of drones, worker bees
from the honey factory, unemployed bees and elderly bees.
Out of the ten members of the group, there were two bees that
seemed to stand out from each other. One bee, Stan "Stinger"Bee
was a long time factory worker and advocated the need for more
low-income housing and first time honey cone loan programs. He
saw the need to recognize the lower to middle class working bees
in the community. Buzzard always let "Stinger" Bee voice
his opinion due to the fact that he was one big bee and has earned
his namesake. Then there was Billy "Beeswax" Bee. He
was a drone that lived in the high-rise honey cone condos overlooking
the daffodil gardens. Many believe he wanted to get on the advisory
board just to see what kind of deal he could make with the city
in the development of new housing. Beeswax was the biggest contractor
in all of Gardenville.
Buzzard saw a potential problem between these two bees developing.
Because these two bees are knowledgeable about what the citizens
of the village need and do have a general interest in the welfare
in the development of Gardenville, Buzzard decided to keep both
of them on the group.
In order to get a better idea of the needs of all the bees in
the village, the group performed a survey to assess what the needs
were, formed several bee participation sessions and gathered demographic
information on the village of Gardenville. From this information,
the bees were able to formulate a list of ideas and goals for
the housing plan.
One of the ideas for the plan was created by Beeswax. With dollar
signs in his eyes, he in visioned a new high-rise of honey combs
that were octagons shaped instead of the usual hexagon shape.
In his eyes, he saw money in the construction of these comb condos.
On the other side, Stinger saw right through Beeswax's attempt
at trying to solicit money. Stinger was so angered by Beeswax
and the other drones that he formed an opposition group of primarily
factory bees. He figured he needed help in the voice against Beeswax.
Buzzard was really starting to get nervous at this point. He was
told by the council to complete this housing plan for the village.
At first, the planning process was going smoothly until he put
the group together. From that point, there were disagreements
within the group, the community and the council on what should
be done to ease the housing problem. Buzzard didn't know what
to do. Certainly with the rise of opposition, the problem of keeping
the group under control and focuses was getting harder.
This is when Buzzard decided to reach deep inside of himself and
use his mediation and consensus building skills to get the Beeswaxes
and the Stingers together in agreement of a housing solution.
This worked! The group was able to come up with a complete housing
plan for the village of Gardenville that was even passed by the
council of drones with no opposition.
Buzzard learned that many times when you work in groups to get
a common goal accomplished, problems and opposition arise. He
learned that happens in groups and used mediation and consensus
building to gain middle ground on the issue. Even though it may
be impossible to get everything you want because of the needs
and wants of others may be different, it isn't impossible to compromise
to make both sides happy.
The End!
Anita Forst
Across the main land of Mindanao, there is a little island which people described as a paradise. It is abundant with rich soil produced from the eruption of volcanoes. Such eruptions caused a part of a little village during the Spaniards regime to submerge in seawater which lately is called the Sunken Cemetery. The other natural resources brought about by the presence of Hibok-Hibok volcano is the thermal water at the north side of the island which people thought be therapeutic, the spring water at the south side of the island and another source is a hot stream just at the foot of the volcano wherein people can cook an egg by just putting it in a knit bag and submerging it under water. The people's source of living is fishing, farming, livestock raising and trading. You can tour the island on foot for three days and the island can be reached by motorized canoe from the mainland for about two hours.
One day., an engineer from an English-speaking country happened to visit the island and become fascinated by the natural beauty of the place. He felt relaxed just listening to the sound of the sea, the singing of the birds during the day and the sound of the crickets during the night. He enjoyed the hospitality of the local folks inviting him for dinner and serving him fresh fruits and the delicacy of the island.... the seafoods. He noticed a lot of things during his stay. First, he arrived on the beach since there was no port in the island; it took him days to go around the island following a trail; the soil is so rich and abundant with produce yet there was no way of bringing their products to other islands due to the absence of some facilities, people just gathered around some open spaces and began trading... with his expertise he felt that he can help and introduce modernization to this community.
Time past so quickly that he did not realize how long he stayed
on the island and that he had to get back to the mainland and
get in touch with his own people who might have been worried about
his absence. The day before his departure, the leaders of the
island had a meeting and invited him to attend and share his views
and visions for the community.. then he started laying out the
gates to modern world... He showed them how to build new roads,
bridges, piers, an airport, a market square, and new buildings
for housing and government. Before anyone realized it, the island
had been transformed into a modern island paradise and it quickly
became a major tourist attraction in SouthEast Asia.
On the day of his departure, he taught some local people with
whom he had made friends some English words. Among these words
was the expression "come again." This
expression caught the local people's fancy and they decided on
the spot to call their island paradise "Camiguin," pronounced
"Cah-mee-geen.'1
Leila Short
There once was a planner named the Little Sprout. Sprout was the City Planner for Le Sueur, Minnesota. City Planners are supposed to be the champions of protecting and preserving the public interest. The process of doing this can become tricky though, as you will see.
One day, many years ago a proposal for a shiny new downtown shopping mall came before the city. Sprout was not happy about this. He was an alum of the Planning Program at Mankato State University and had taken Historic Preservation. He knew the importance of keeping the traditional, vibrant downtown intact. Unfortunately for Sprout, he did not have the political clout nor final say in the matter to keep this mall from happening. You see, Sprout was the son of the legendary Jolly Green Giant, longtime influential City Council member for Le Sueur and CEO for the Green Giant Company. Sprout and his father had not gotten along for years since his father's bitter divorce with his mother, the Valley Maid, who now is immortalized on many of the trucks for the Le Sueur Cheese Company.
The City Council felt a private consultant should be brought in to examine the condition of the downtown. At this time the central business district was a vibrant collection of brothels and roadhouses. Street life flourished in this part of the downtown. The consultant did not like what he saw however. "HUD is giving away all this money to rebuild your CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT, you should take it," he advised Sprout. These words of advice fell on the deaf ears. "How can I endorse a plan that will destroy the heart of our beautiful downtown?" "Heck, I practically grew up at Suzy's Roadhouse." Sprout could no longer bear dealing with a project he knew was not in the best interest of the public. He knew that in the AICP Code of Ethics it states in section A 1 that a planner must have special concern for the long range consequences of present actions. Being the pious planner he was, he had to follow his ethical obligation. He refused to endorse nor work with this project.
The private consultant stayed on the assignment, under the urging of the Giant. The HUD money was secured and demolition of the "social and cultural heart of the city," as Sprout called it began. Within a short time the Smurfs were brought in to construct the Valleygreen Square Mall. This was completed in short order, no pun intended.
At the next city council meeting the Giant informed Sprout that the city was letting him go. "You can still go to that brothel in the alley out back," his father told him. "That's the only place you could get any anyway heh heh," the Giant laughed. This did not sit well with Sprout as his anger grew to a rage. Not being able to handle the taunting any more, he stormed out of City Hall. "They think they've got me now, I'll show 'em," Sprout thought to himself.
In his fit of rage Sprout jumped into the nearest combine he could find. "Ha Ha Dad," he chuckled with a look of dementia in his eyes. "We'll see who gets the last laugh now." As the Giant walked out the back door after the meeting he noticed his crazed son in the combine. The Giant tried to run but was no match for the speedy combine. The giant tripped over a house and fell to the ground, screaming in pain as Sprout ground him up slowly with the combine, laughing ever more hysterically. Within a few hours, as the Sprout relished in his father's demise, the Giant was reduced to nothing more than a pile of leaves.
After a lengthy trial the murder charges against Sprout were dropped due to inconclusive DNA evidence. Many citizens felt he only got off because he was green, but to Sprout it didn't matter. He was a free man.
By this time it was becoming obvious to the remaining members of the city council that the mall did not produce the same high quality social setting the traditional downtown did. They invited Sprout to attend their next meeting. With plenty of leisure time on his hands and becoming tired of watching late night infomercials he obliged. To his surprise the purpose of the invitation was to reinstate him as planer. "We need a man like you sprout." "We need your someone with your ethics and righteousness." Sprout was delighted to be the City Planner again.
The next day he attended a reading of the will for his father. He discovered that with the Giant's death, he inherited the CEO position and majority ownership of the Green Giant Company. Sprout truly felt as though he was leading a charmed life. He went home that night to check out the latest Tony Little infomercial. As he sat down to enjoy a fine Green Giant microwavable entree he chuckled to himself and said:"planners always get the last laugh."
Brad Bressler
I am not sure if the story I am going to tell is a story of urban
planning. Because it is just a story about field survey - more
like a exploration than like a planning practice.
In June, 1988, when I was in my junior year, our Geography Department
received a letter from the mayor of city Shi Yian, which is a
medium sized city in our province, inviting our department to
make a survey to see if there is possibility to establish a provincial
tourism district in the mountain Shal Wu Dang area, which is 25
miles away from the city.
In response to his invitation, a 16 person group was formed (two
professors and 14 students), and I was lucky to become a member
of this group. We were so excited, because this area was the only
area (in our province) remained unsettled-- an original secondary
forest area and absolutely wild world.
The city government offered us all we need, from vehicles, measuring
instruments, to large scale maps, compasses, telescopes, and ropes.
They even, for our safety, gave each of us a knife and assigned
two hunters to accompany us, because, although rarely seen, dangerous
animals such as leopards, wild pigs, and bears did exist in this
area.
Things do not go the way as people expect. As we arrived at the
foot of the mountain, We began to confront problems one after
another. There is not road to go inside, so we had to get out
of the car, approaching the mountain by foot. The deciduous leaves,
which were 10-15 inch in height, covered the whole ground, and
made even the unloaded walk difficult, let alone the walk with
30 pound of equipment on each of our shoulders. at the mean time,
we had to watch out for the unexpected confront with the wild
animals. The most serious problem is that we could not see the
sunlight in the daytime because of the high density of the forest.
We kept getting lost even depended on the compasses for the direction.
We had to use our own judgment such as watching the tree trunks
to tell the direction. I still remember that one time, after climbing
on a precipitous cliff, we could not find the way back ! We were
almost despaired until, fortunately, we slide down the cliff by
rope. It is so difficult to find and locate a site on a map that
we spent 10 days (instead of assumed 7 days) on finishing the
survey.
After 10 days' investigation, and another 20 days' analysis and
discussion, we wrote a report to the city government, making the
following summaries:
After turning in the report, we felt a kind of sorry. Because
we realized that the city desperately needed that plan. The city
is located in a poor remote mountain area in our province, and
tourism resources is the only few resources that can be utilized
to develop its local economy. But we must respect the truth. As
far as our knowledge about economic geography and tourism geography
and what we had obtained from the survey. We should not give them
a positive advice.
Although it is not a successful experience, we still learn a lot
from it. It specially taught us how to use the knowledge we have
learned in class to deal with the concrete cases and unexpected
conditions.
By the way, just before I got here, I heard from a friend that
a natural park instead of tourism one had just been build in that
area.
Heming Zhu
A tall tale by Steven Robertson
We are in a room, known to most as the County Coordinator's Office, but recently dubbed the "War Room" by the coordinator. Smoke fills it throughout, with a feeble lamp providing the only overhead light. The coordinator and his trusty intern, Lee, again are involved in animated discussion for the third time this night.
"...So, to review, we will first start with a fierce enfilading fire from the high ground, followed quickly by a harassing flanking attack on the extreme left. With their attention draw to our diversion, we will easily split the weakened center and break their forces into two smaller camps, which will be overwhelmed in detail. The classic sledgehammer attack to their crust defense. In worked for Napoleon at Solerno, it worked for Lee at Chancellorsville, at it will work for us tomorrow! Did you get all that Lee?"
"Well, um, yes sir, just that..."
"Just what?"
"What does this have to do with the County Commissioners' Board Meeting?"
The County Coordinator exhaled audibly. "You haven't been paying attention, have you, Lee? Fine, we will review the plan again."
The coordinator paces back and forth, whacking a ruler in his hand. Lee periodically checks his watch and mentally tallies how much of Letterman he has missed so far.
"Then we will break their forces into two smaller camps, which can be overwhelmed individually. Really, Lee, the plan is quite simple. I really don't understand why you are having such difficulty with it."
"Well, um, sir, it's just that I don't think the county commissioners will appreciate us waging war against them. Especially with us being their employees and all."
"I don't like it anymore than you. Instigating a coup d'etat is not going to do much to improve my reputation, but this is only way we can make them reason with us."
"So basically, sir, you plan to make them reason with you by attacking them?"
"Exactly! Now you are starting to understand, Lee. Ok, here is how things will go tomorrow. We will wait until the Chairman calls the meeting to order. Once they begin roll call, we will give our forces the green light and commence the attack. Afterwards, you will supervise the collection of prisoners once the commissioners have surrendered. Any questions?"
"Sir, what exactly are our forces? Not to underestimate your battle plan or anything, but I think we may need more than three janitors and Mrs. Wilson, the temp secretary from Quality Staffing."
I¹ll have no defeatist talk in my outfit, mister! Is that clear?"
"Of course, sir. But with all due respect, sir, I don't think the county's personnel policy allows interns to take prisoners."
"Not take prisoners! Good God man! Haven't you ever heard of the Geneva Convention? Do you think we are animals?
"Yes, sir, uh, I mean no, sir!"
"Lee, I am starting to have second thoughts about you. What did they teach you at that fancy university you went to? Regardless, Lee, we will be taking prisoners!"
"Sir, exactly why are we attacking the county commissioners tomorrow?"
"Because I have constantly told the commissioners how inefficient the county's political system is, how archaic it is, but they simply will not listen."
Change the county's political system? What is the coordinator talking about? To the uninformed citizen, a county is just a thing, a nondescript government blob that exists on the periphery of their lives. The only time most people take notice of their county government is when it comes time to pay property tax, or when it is time to elect new representatives to lead their county (and only then when it coincides with a presidential election). To explain briefly, this particular county is lead by nine elected officials. There are five county commissioners elected to guide the efforts of the county and look after their constituents; they are like a mini-congress for the county. These five make up the county board and they are who the county coordinator (and his intern) serve. The other four are elected to fill particular jobs. They historically have been: the sheriff, the county clerk, the county treasurer, and the auditor. It is with this last group of four that the county coordinator takes exception with.
"The commissioners just ignore me. They are so used to having the county system this way they can't imagine it being any different."
"Why is this issue so important to you? Can't you just drop it, or at least compromise?"
"Lee, in the immortal words of Martin Luther, 'Here I stand, I can do no other'. It is my job to ensure the county runs as smoothly and efficiently as possible. I can settle for no less."
"I see. So, what do you suggest, sir?"
"I believe that the offices of sheriff, county clerk, county treasurer, and auditor be appointed, not elected. These positions should be staffed with those professional people who are schooled in the techniques of their particular job, and who are able to bring knowledge and experience to their respective departments."
"I¹m sorry, sir, but I don't see what is so bad about the old way. It may not be the best system in the world, but it works. And you know the old saying, 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'."
"Lee, that kind of logic explains why we should be riding horses instead of driving cars and using the pony express instead of fax machines. Almost everything can be improved."
"That is a good point, sir, but these positions have always been elected, and besides, there is no pressure to change the current system."
"True, these positions have always been elected, but our increasingly complex society may no longer function well if it continues to fill important administrative jobs with those people whose only credentials are that they won a popularity contest. And yes, currently there is no great citizen outcry to change the status quo. But, I think it is safe if we assume that the average citizen has minimal knowledge of what it takes to run an efficient county administrative office. We can also assume that the average citizen does have an interest in seeing their county government as responsive and effective as possible, as well as their tax dollars spent in the wisest way possible."
"Interesting. But, despite all the good points you make, sir, doesn't state law mandate these elected offices?"
"Yes and no, Lee. In the end, the people run the county and the laws reflect their desires. If the people want, they can petition to have the state legislature pass a statue to change the elected positions to appointed positions."
"Let me get this straight, sir. Basically, you hope to improve the county by replacing some elected officials who may lack important training and skills by appointing professionally qualified individuals to their jobs."
"Exactly!"
What an exciting idea! Finally, a method to improve government without raising the cost. Why hasn't this idea been given more attention? In this day and age of increasingly complex work environments and raising demands on government, it is obvious that this is an idea who's time has come.
"I admit, sir, that this is a very good idea, but I don't think it has been tried by any other county in South Dakota. Won't we be the first?"
"I have always said, Lee, that just like neutrality and virginity, there are advantages with the first offense."
"So you are saying that just because no one else has done it yet, it shouldn't stop us from trying it."
"Precisely. I guess that fancy Mankato State did teach you a thing or two."
"Yes, sir. I still have one concern, though. What if we fail. I mean, even though all the points you made are good, and I agree with your conclusion, there is still a small chance that something might go wrong. It could be risky business. What then?"
"Lee, as Benjamin Disraeli said, 'Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action'. If we fail, so be it. But this is a great idea, and the benefit to the county is well worth any risk. Besides, we owe it to ourselves and the citizens of this fine county to try our damnedest."
"Yes, sir!"
"Ok then, back to the strategy session. I think we could use a diversion before the battle starts..."
"Sir, why don't you try talking to the commissioners tomorrow. Tell them everything you have told me. Maybe they just might have some common sense and see the advantages to your plan."
"Hmm, reason with politicians. Now that is risky business. Do you really think that they might listen to me?"
"Certainly, sir. After all, you are the county coordinator."
"Well, Ok, Lee, we will try it your way tomorrow. I will try to reason with the commissioners, again. But if it does not work, we may have to resort to the battle plan."
"Um...I think we can cross that bridge when we get to it, sir. To tell the truth, if the commissioners still don't listen to you after you make all those good points about appointing rather than electing administrative officials, I may just join you."
"Of course you will. A good intern's place is at his coordinator¹s side."
"Uh...yes, sir. Hey, lets get some coffee at the Happy Chef; I've missed Letterman's top ten list anyway."
"Sure, get the light on your way out."
"Yes, sir."
And so off go our heroes, and with them, our hopes. What will
happen tomorrow? Will the county commissioners see the light and
embrace the future of appointing administrative positions? Or
will they refuse to consider the ideas of our intrepid twosome,
too blinded by their own fears of change? Only time will tell.
Good luck heroes, and God bless.
Steve Robertson (This story is also available on his Homepage)
THE CITY
There is a city north of here,
Named, Le Sueur.
Many of the people could
Build with wood.
But only with much desire
They were destroyed by a fire!
Not Once, not twice, but times four
Within a period of nine yore.
It destroyed the city
Oh, what a pity!
The need to rebuild
could hardly be stilled.
So in 1868 the use of brick
instead of stick.
Is what there buildings became made of.
By 1977, the buildings still stood.
But, progress came along without wood.
Urban renewal of the cities revitalized the downtowns.
But within a few years the people had frowns.
For all of the planning and rebuilding
Stood nothing but empty buildings
For according to some urban renewal was a goo thing you see.
But by Nineteen hundred and ninety three.
The mall stood empty and all alone.
It wasn't made of wood or stone.
But what have we done to our cities of past.
We now have stores, malls or buildings which do not last.
A trend, urban renewal and a mall
What will they think of next at city hall!
dail-in
janey isn't allowed into her daddy's den
without an escort-- a big brother or charles 2,
the king's cytosine secretary--
but she knows the pass codes and access keys to the
flymachine
by heart
ah..ha! BANG!
too many cuban grey evening internet lap safaris
chasing down the satellites
jack-up
little girls DON'T know about stuff microscopic or
bytes globally glued...
she remembers the keys tonight, slightly sweaty,
listening carefully
displacing fathers F Times and pipe cleaners,
broken floppies, parking receipts, ball point pens and
and her own endangered digital image library...
on his old broken-back leather chair, she DOES feel
his icons watching back-- through the gurgling screen
driving the icons
daddy is a disney man-- mickey, daffey, dicky--
he howls as the extension icons
float past the screen
rows and rows of cute little pixtures...
bloom-out like a trophy chest of ribbons
janey knows'em by heart: the face, chipper-dipper, queball,
inverse elvis.
one can't the extension icon army for granted!
you only have four seconds to witness their silent
cry for help-- before the bootstrap latches shut
and the desktop sea appears
>> entering mythcom.com <<
janey ignores the silly aliases that float before her now
she sticks right into the server script pile
digital diver. ballast, her clue seeking fingers
client code:
23rhggz*
I.D.:
########
WELCOME TO
mythcom.com
"where is the plan?" she putters... >>u.n.listserve<<
"leaders?" >>www.avis.com/maps/mn.html<< janey wants TO KNOW
>>tibet.com<<
>>golf.mit.gold/edu/p-library/atlantis/6003.2/vr.vrtl<< "ourserver is down"
cpsr? surf..>>computer professionals social responsibilty<<...
please pay with a credit card
no membership will be actived with prior payment
waiting...
waiting...
"whales on video":
>>http://greenpeace.org/campaigns/dolphins/images.html<<
"15 minutes with Andy Warhol" at >>www.soho.arts/andy.vrml<<
she is crashing the third wave.
altavista!
whenever Father drove out of ideas or new connections, he went
to
>>digital.unified.com<< for the best search engine on the web.
he had it bookmarked. janey hyper-types:
"children community network future"
"now we're getting somewhere," checking her digital diver's watch
for reflection, "charles 2 is at the cyber fair, keep going
girl..."
site hits for sore eyes
kidspace sfx
museums of the world homepage
philadelphia zoo
web.kit.9
outback classroom
math'r'us
underground the beaming
quaker youth - virtual campsites
bugs, inc.
paints, pens, and video cards
NASA
Harvard's Children's University on the Web
paul bunyan's blues
Internet Math Club
beyond & back
welcome to underground the beaming - english version
we are a server collective of 10 - 12 year olds
in Berlin, the Capital of unified Germany.
to access the chat scope, please respond to the following
questions:
who are you?
.....................
how old are you?
.....
where do you live?
.............
how did you find us?
.....................
your e-mail address?
....@...........
enter!
"great luck!" maybe she can find someone...
welcome to underground the beaming and chat scope
please keep your access data private:
ID: ............
Pass Word: ............
you may enter now or return at a later time.
to chat, press F8:
to exit, press escape or return:
rolfing the wave
rolf was online at his secondary school
hoping that the scope was hot with anyone cool
then janey appeared through her text lines
and the walls came down.
"Guten Aben!"
"hey, what time is it there?"
"four-fifteen, yes. and there?"
"nine-thirty in the evening..."
"I'm searching for ways to help out the planet," she says
"on a journey today, janey?"
"yes! What is happening in your city?"
"do you know about the rebuilding here?"
"yes. some...are you helping?"
"our class is painting pictures for our school web site.
you can access the Underlich Elemenatisch Virtual Kampus
at >>www-berlin.underlich/elem/virtual.html<<"
"great. it's marked!"
"and you? what ways are you and your friends connecting the
world together?"
"Rolf, I'm still trying to get my own PC and internet account!"
"you must be home now, yes?"
"ya, but my father restricts my use of his equipment. I must only watch!"
"and at school...?"
"most kids just screw around on the net!"
"perhaps you need to teach your classmates what you know
and start your own change engine?"
later, when the dust was back in its place in the den
and no one the wiser
janey couldn't sleep
she was excited from her solo joust into the global fray
and just as excited to tell her friends about chat scope
and Rolf and Berlin and change!
tomorrow she would start searching for some
used computer stuff
and program the library's computer
to bring Berlin and Port Washington online together
with underground the beaming
william paul
This is a tale that has been passed down for many generations to the first born male Balster. As near as we can tell it has been around since the Balster family emigrated from Germany to the old Northwest Territory. The tale begins with four characters who are symbolically chosen to represent the creatures involved. The first and main character is the planner who is represented by a Timberwolf. The other three are: 1. commoners, 2. business community, 3. elite class, which are all represented by domesticated pigs. This was chosen because they are the natural prey of wolves, and being domesticated they can not defend themselves as easily as wild pigs can.
The planner or wolf came from a distant land looking for easy prey that knew nothing of his kind. The wolf also had the problem of not knowing the territory or where exactly to find them, but his friends told him of rumors of a land of plenty. All of his friends believed it was just a rumor; just like the rumor that the world is round. When the wolf was being told by his friends of their belief that the world is flat he started to snicker, and asked sarcastically, "You mean you actually believe the worlds flat?"
"Yes" they answered angrily.
The wolf then started to cry from laughing so hard. When he finally caught his breath he asked them sardonically, "Where do you think our prey is moving to?.. France to be with those slimy frogs?" His friends were flabbergasted and didn't know how to answer the wolf. The wolf answered for them, "If you believe that the world is flat then the rumor of a new land of plenty has to be true. Well gentlepups, I am going to find this place, live to be wealthy, powerful, and never be hungry; unlike you who are numerous and will be just another furry face in the crowd," the wolf exclaimed.
At the same time new land was being domesticated by pigs and creatures from other countries who were also strong willed, independent and knew of the reality of the dangerous land they left behind. The first generation of these pigs were raised to be self-sufficient and untrusting of government actions because it hides creatures that want to destroy what they have toiled to create. By the second generation their parents never saw or heard of such creatures and thought their parents were crazy old bores, therefore the next generation was never taught the old ways. These pigs became domesticated, soft, vulnerable, and altruistic towards the world and all of its creature.
When creatures from distant lands moved into the territory they brought with them rumors and stories of creatures that destroyed what others have toiled to create. The pigs did not believe the stories these strangers told anymore than their parents and quickly became complacent and soft. This complacency made them very vulnerable to enemies eventually this information made it back to those enemies.
When the wolf landed in the new land he heard of pigs and creatures that did not believe in wolves, in fact they thought it was a myth. Standing on the great unnamed city's streets with many different creatures walking past him, he knew that this was the place that he had been searching for so long. The memory of his friends telling him that this place did not exist caused him to snicker to himself. It slowly became more intense and what came from his throat was a evil, crazy laugh -- an unstoppable chortle, that if continued would surely put him in a house full of nuts. Frogs, lions, and bears heard him laughing as they walked by him, which caused them to be startled and give a great amount of clearance.
The three pigs settled down in a great plain and constructed houses so that they could settle the land. The first pig (commoners) constructed a house made of straw because it is inexpensive and can easily be repaired. The second pig (business community) made a house out of the few trees that occupied the plains land and by hiring the commoners to cut down the trees. The third pig (elite class) made a house out of brick and mortar, gathered and made by the commoners and financed by the business community. The elite and business community made their homes to display their status and wealth, not because they are safer.
After a short while the wolf made it from the coast of the land to the heart of the great and plentiful land. Being a logical sociopathic wolf he knew that the pigs would settle near a river with a large flood plain.
"Those silly pigs, so set in their ways and arrogant, I can't wait to show them what the true definition of arrogance is; Me! Hee!Ha!Ha!Ha," the wolf chortled.
He found the first pig diligently working the mud and straw into bricks. Quietly he walked up behind him and asked, "Are those bricks for your house?" The pig scared that it was his boss, the elite pig, caught him making bricks that only elite classes are allowed to use to make houses, trembling he said "No."
"No?!" the wolf exclaimed, "Well what is your house made of?"
Swallowing his stomach that seemed to leap to his mouth the pig replied, "Straw."
"Straw, Hmm. Well lets go look at this house."
"Yes Sir, its just a little ways from here," the pig was sad, scared and thought that he was in trouble. Being scared and not allowed to gaze into the eyes of an elitist, he kept his head down and eyes on the path in front of him. "Here it is."
Laughing at the flimsy house the wolf said, "If you tell me the weaknesses of the pig whose house is made of bricks I will not take your house and land."
The pig now knew it wasn't his boss, it was a WOLF! disguising his voice.
"Now you know wolves are real and if you do not cooperate I will take everything."
The pig screamed, "No!No!No!, I can't" and ran into his house carefully closing his door so as to not knock it down.
"You think that can protect you and I will go away? I am very real and powerful; tell me now or else!" Calming himself he spoke in perfect English he told the pig, "It's my way or the highway, their are no exceptions."
"Please, I can't, I am just a poor little pig, I can't afford to put my job in jeopardy."
The wolf leaned against the house collapsing it, which quickly fell on the pig. The wolf exclaimed femininely and sarcastically, "oops...who knew it would break so easily?"
The pig exclaimed angrily, "You're naughty, you know I can't afford to change or tell you what you want to know. Please, I never hurt anyone, why don't you pick on someone who is a challenge, like my neighbor, the businesspig?"
The wolf contemplated, "hmm, good idea maybe I will. I'll be back if you lied and you will end up working for me paying me to allow you to put up your house."
"Jerk," the pig whispered under his breath.
"What?!-- I'll forgive you this time, don't forget I see and know everything, unlike you which can't see the snout on your face." Thinking to himself while walking to the second pigs house, "Boy, that was good, I've got to remember to use that one again."
The second pig was inside his home doing paperwork, counting his wealth, and contemplating how to be one of the elite. The wolf peered in the window and knew his weakness; the desire to be an elitist. Knocking on the door he knew the words to say to get to him. The pig asked through the door what the stranger wanted, figuring it was the commoner begging for money again. The wolf told him he had a way to make him an elitist by using his wealth. Not even hesitating the pig opened the door figuring even if it was the Devil himself he would welcome him into his home. Startled, he saw a tall handsome and well-dressed wolf standing before him.
"Please come in and tell me more," the pig stated calmly.
The wolf thanked him, took off his top hat and asked for a cup of tea with honey. The pig thought he was quite pretentious, but then again who cares as long as he delivers. Sipping his tea with honey the wolf calmly told the business pig how if they combined his ability and knowledge with the pigs wealth they could make the elite pig beg for leniency. The pig told the wolf he owned the land the elite pig had his house on. They could make the pig move his house to land that the business pig would own by using his wealth to buy all the prime real estate lots.
Smiling the wolf knew he was well on his way to owning this town. Thanking the pig he told him he would be back to check-up on his progress. "I have to go now, I have other business to attend to" the wolf said calmly and started to head for the door while still holding his steaming cup of tea. The pig was going to ask for his cup back, but decided he shouldn't push his luck for he didn't know what the mysterious wolf would do.
Still sipping his tea while walking to the elite pigs home he was amazed how good the tea was, it was then knew he was tasting victory. After finishing his tea he put the cup in his coat pocket for times when a expensive cup would give the kind of effect that is necessary. It was now time to find the elitists house which he figured had to be fairly simple. Finding the elitists house was easy after all, for he knew it would be on a hill to proclaim his status to everyone.
Knocking on the door several times the pig finally crawled out of bed even though it was the middle of the day, with the sun still quite high in the sky. With the door opening he could feel cool air rushing over his hot legs and paws. Squinting in the bright sun the pig asked what the tall stranger wanted. The wolf said, "if you do not act quickly the business pig will force you to move, but don't fret - I can help."
"Prey tell me how is this possible," the pig inquired.
The wolf invited himself and began tell him how the business pig plans to force him to move the house and thereby forced to do his bidding. The wolf started to leave, and the pig said, "how can I repay you?"
"Don't worry, one day I'll be back and you will owe me some favors," the wolf stated.
"Thank you, what ever you desire will be yours," the pig yelled to the wolf, for he was walking down the road with his immaculately suit and top hat on.
The wolf was able to keep the business pig and the elitist fighting each other for many years. The conflict made the wolf rich, powerful and lonely. Being lonely with no friends or family made him miserable and desperate for friends since the two rich pigs only associated with him because the wolf knew how to help them. But the wolf also knew that continuing in this manner would only further alienate the entire community and signal his downfall. He knew how because he was the one that was creating problems and completely manipulating them both to achieve his ends.
The wolf being desperate yet logical knew the only possibility was the commoner pigs. But they wouldn't accept him because he ruined his reputation by leaning and tearing down their houses. Being an intelligent, knowledgeable, and cunning wolf he knew how he could gain friends and assure that he would his powerful position permanently. By manipulating the rich pigs into allowing land for farms, homes, and loans at a reasonable price he convinced them that the commoners would be the difference in their fight. He then announced to the common pigs that he brought together the two enemies to benefit the poor who have been suffering in the rich and elite pigs fight.
The wolf was so successful that he was able to keep the position and passed it on to his sons and daughters, and then to their children. The planner wolves moved to other cities and became very successful just like in the old country. The lessons learned by the wolf, the most important being taking care of the large common class pigs desires will make a wolf successful for a long time, while the other method is only temporary and dangerous.
Thomas Balster
Fare Share Housing : Case of Mt. Laurel
Once upon a time, there was a large neighborhood
where many rich black mice and a few poor black mice
lived together. As the black mice moved into the neighborhood
and it became congested, the white mice and their workplaces
moved into the suburb neighborhoods. The black mice
was afraid about where they could get food because they
were losing opportunities to earn their food. Thus,
they decided to move into the suburbs. But it was difficult
for the cheap houses where they could live were rare
in the suburbs. The rich white mice disliked to have
the poor black mice as their neighbors, and they blocked
construction of the cheap houses by zoning ordinances
and building codes.
The black mice built an organization for their affordable
housing, and petitioned the king mouse who had ruled
the mouse state for the solution of the problem. They
argued that the white mice in the suburbs were discriminating
them. The king thought about for whom he should determine,
and what was the way in which all mice could live
together peacefully. The king ordered a vassal to take
steps in order for the cheap houses to be built in
the suburbs. Then, the white mice in the suburbs protested
against the king's decision. They argued that they would
not take the higher burden of tax to support the poor
mice's living conditions. The king had to rethink about
this problem. Finally, he decided that the state should
give the financial assist to the neighborhoods which
the black mice would move into.
The black mice welcomed the king's solution. They applauded it as an epoch - making event of fair governance. According to the decision, some houses were built in the suburbs. There was, however, few black mice in the newly built houses in the suburbs. The king had to ask to himself. Why didn't my efforts work ? What more steps do we need ? The king's vassals in charge of housing planning have been trying to find the answer till now.
Chigon Kim
There once was a man who lived under a tree
He had everything that he would need
Food from the branches and shade from the sun
His life was simple and much fun
He found a wife and then there was three
His little tree was not built for three
so he cut down the tree and built a house
The house was big and had a garage
Soon a man came and asked for his permit
Another came to measure his roof and floor space
yet another came to look at his pipes and electrical lights
The last man came in a nice new suit and asked for some property
tax
On the second day a letter arrived at his door
It stated his house was on a designated wetland
His house would have to be torn down or moved to new land
Notice given for the next sixty days
The man was sad and very confused
His little tree had been sacrificed for this dream
So he went outside and planted a seed
His hope was that the seed would bring a new tree.
Toby Brown
Come and listen to a story 'bout an URSI prof we know,
A humble Detroit boy who knew planning soon would grow.
Then one day he was in a planning mode,
When deep within his brain he hit the planning motherlode.
Urban Planning-that is,
TIF Districts-Real Estate Pro Forma.
Well the first thing you know Tony's extra-ordinaire,
The kin folks said, "Tony, move away from there."
Said "Minnesota is the place you oughta go."
So he loaded up the truck and moved to Mankato.
State University-that is,
Tenure track. No heavy lifting.
No you know the ballad of Mankato's favorite son,
He's been here eighteen years, though it seems like 51.
We're all invited back next week to this locality,
To have a heapin' helpin' of planning and URSI.
Jeff Samuels
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